Sight for Sore Eyes

Familiar sight? Then congratulations you have been to the opticians and if you were lucky you have perfect vision. Unlike me. When I go into the opticians for a sight test and see (what I just found out is called a Snellen Test) on the wall, I pretty much instantly start trying to memorise it because well lets face it when they make me take my lenses out in about a minute and a half this is what i'm going to have to contend with...

Except not even that does it justice really, because in truth the only way I'd know the E at the top is if I had memorised it a minute earlier. Although it shouldn't be, admitting you can't see anything on the board is just plain depressing! So then if you are lucky they sit you behind a big contraption that flicks through different prescriptions while you try your hardest to squint without the opticians noticing. 

Its an O, No actually I think it's a C. Yeah a C. No! It's a D. 100% (the only reason you know this is that handy dandy tip of memorising the letters earlier on). So on and on the test goes, you quickly realise you are losing to the optician as the lines get smaller and smaller and more blurry. Then comes the dreaded Red or Green test. 

"Which is clearer the read one or green?"

Errrm Green

Ok how about now (they change something in the machine) 

Red

Now?

Green

Now? 

Green

Now? 

Both the same

But if you had to pick one as being clearer

But they both look the same...

But just if you had to pick?

Errr Green?

This back and fourth exchange usually ends up with me in a guessing game trying desperately just to make it end! 

I know you are probably thinking, it's really not that bad. Ok maybe for most its not but for me its only been fairly traumatising up to this point. But then...

Ever stood this close to a stranger whilst they peer into your eyes? Well then you have never lived, this has to be the most awkward moment of the whole thing when your lovely opticians face is so close to yours you could give them an Eskimo kiss if you moved too quickly. Delightful. Possibly one of the hardest things not to laugh at, much like when you were at school during an assembly and you got a fit of the giggles during the most solemn silent part... Once I got that close to laughing right in the opticians face I had to break the tension by asking, "Do many people laugh right in your face when you do this?" Answer "All the time!" I must say I felt like I had the best self control at that moment. I am the biggest giggler ever! 

Anyway as much as I have moaned and groaned about having to get a sight test, I thank everyone that helps to give me the gift of sight... Yaay 

Hold on a sec. I bet right now you are thinking, in the second paragraph she said if you are lucky they sit you behind a big contraption... (if you weren't thinking that then now you are) But what I hear you cry... What is the alternative?

There are no words.

Peace x